deviant
05-17-2007, 12:58 PM
one brave boyfriend bitches about his bouts with 'that time of the month.' after all,if men and women are equal,then hear this guy's version of the effects of pms on him.
“Ladies and gentlemen, please return to your seats and fasten your seatbelts. We are approaching some patches of turbulence ahead.” Whenever these words are uttered in an airplane, an uncomfortable stirring runs through the general passenger populace. Along with it, various reactions are seen: seatbelts clicking under whispered curses, barf bags readied with disgust, rosaries held tightly by nervous hands, sleep attempted in great haste.
This is exactly how most men view pre-menstrual syndrome (PMS). It’s the unnecessary, unpredictable, bumpy portion of a usually smooth ride. Unless your girlfriend’s period is irregular, you might know when it’s going to strike or maybe how long it’s going to last. But there’s no reassurance. Men still have to be prepared and face PMS in their own way, go with the flow, so to speak.
I used to be dead-set on having a good time with my girlfriend regardless of her PMS. During her time of month, my girlfriend gets really quiet, moody—and I can’t get anything right. Over the phone, I’d attempt to be funny: crack jokes and make witty remarks, hoping to draw her out of her lifeless mood. When it worked, at least I’d get her talking. But when it didn’t, I’d end up talking to a brick wall. Sometimes I’d take her out, hoping a movie would help. It would start out okay. She’d get all excited, smiling and chatting like nothing was wrong with the world, like she didn’t have her period. After the movie, getting her to talk about the film would be something else. Her mood would plummet and get the better of her. All I would get were mere one-word answers or a flat “It was okay.” When that comes, it means I can forget about coffee, nightcaps or whatever. She’ll just give me the all-too familiar, “I’m sleepy na, eh.” Time to go home.
My girlfriend’s PMS-induced mood catches me off-guard from time to time. It’s difficult to discern if she’s pissed or just not feeling well because of her PMS. How’s a guy to know? When she doesn’t talk, I think I did something wrong. When I pry for clues or answers, she won’t even cooperate. When I ask her what’s wrong, she flares up. We’d fight. Once, in a fit of solitary confinement, my girlfriend decided not to speak to me—I stood in her room for thirty minutes, waiting for a yes or no answer to a simple question I asked her. Recently, I got so pissed that I left her house in a huff when she decided to wall me out again because she “wasn’t feeling well.” (After driving through traffic after a long day at work, she suddenly decided to ignore me when I arrived at her house.) These are the days when my normally calm frame of mind really goes through the roof and my usually orderly world view seems askew.
And when that happens, you can be sure it will affect me in a big way. I’ll be quiet at work the morning after, holing up in my cubicle. I’ll bark at my officemates. I’ll be stressed, sleepy (from fighting with my girlfriend all night on the phone), and just plain cranky. My friends and officemates then become unwitting victims of my own PMS-ing mood. It’s a vicious cycle.
Fine if it happens once but every month, month after month? Am I stuck in a rut? Worse, it seems there’s nothing I can do to help. When I show concern, all I get in return is silence or some half-baked answer (mind you, some of my friends think I’m lucky. It can get worse).
Listen up, guys. I have a solution: sleep through it. Yup, sleep until she eventually comes around. Instead of sitting around and taking unwarranted punches, I let her have her space. I call to check up on her, but I do not expect any conversation. (Knowing that if I prod her, we’ll end up fighting.) Instead of taking her out to cheer her up, I hang out with other friends or spend some time alone. It’s been working out well, so far. I don’t get caught up in her moods, and most of all, I’ve learned not to take it personally, that it is a fact of life that one has to deal with. I just have to hang in there, remain seated with my seatbelt fastened until I get past the turbulence.
“Ladies and gentlemen, please return to your seats and fasten your seatbelts. We are approaching some patches of turbulence ahead.” Whenever these words are uttered in an airplane, an uncomfortable stirring runs through the general passenger populace. Along with it, various reactions are seen: seatbelts clicking under whispered curses, barf bags readied with disgust, rosaries held tightly by nervous hands, sleep attempted in great haste.
This is exactly how most men view pre-menstrual syndrome (PMS). It’s the unnecessary, unpredictable, bumpy portion of a usually smooth ride. Unless your girlfriend’s period is irregular, you might know when it’s going to strike or maybe how long it’s going to last. But there’s no reassurance. Men still have to be prepared and face PMS in their own way, go with the flow, so to speak.
I used to be dead-set on having a good time with my girlfriend regardless of her PMS. During her time of month, my girlfriend gets really quiet, moody—and I can’t get anything right. Over the phone, I’d attempt to be funny: crack jokes and make witty remarks, hoping to draw her out of her lifeless mood. When it worked, at least I’d get her talking. But when it didn’t, I’d end up talking to a brick wall. Sometimes I’d take her out, hoping a movie would help. It would start out okay. She’d get all excited, smiling and chatting like nothing was wrong with the world, like she didn’t have her period. After the movie, getting her to talk about the film would be something else. Her mood would plummet and get the better of her. All I would get were mere one-word answers or a flat “It was okay.” When that comes, it means I can forget about coffee, nightcaps or whatever. She’ll just give me the all-too familiar, “I’m sleepy na, eh.” Time to go home.
My girlfriend’s PMS-induced mood catches me off-guard from time to time. It’s difficult to discern if she’s pissed or just not feeling well because of her PMS. How’s a guy to know? When she doesn’t talk, I think I did something wrong. When I pry for clues or answers, she won’t even cooperate. When I ask her what’s wrong, she flares up. We’d fight. Once, in a fit of solitary confinement, my girlfriend decided not to speak to me—I stood in her room for thirty minutes, waiting for a yes or no answer to a simple question I asked her. Recently, I got so pissed that I left her house in a huff when she decided to wall me out again because she “wasn’t feeling well.” (After driving through traffic after a long day at work, she suddenly decided to ignore me when I arrived at her house.) These are the days when my normally calm frame of mind really goes through the roof and my usually orderly world view seems askew.
And when that happens, you can be sure it will affect me in a big way. I’ll be quiet at work the morning after, holing up in my cubicle. I’ll bark at my officemates. I’ll be stressed, sleepy (from fighting with my girlfriend all night on the phone), and just plain cranky. My friends and officemates then become unwitting victims of my own PMS-ing mood. It’s a vicious cycle.
Fine if it happens once but every month, month after month? Am I stuck in a rut? Worse, it seems there’s nothing I can do to help. When I show concern, all I get in return is silence or some half-baked answer (mind you, some of my friends think I’m lucky. It can get worse).
Listen up, guys. I have a solution: sleep through it. Yup, sleep until she eventually comes around. Instead of sitting around and taking unwarranted punches, I let her have her space. I call to check up on her, but I do not expect any conversation. (Knowing that if I prod her, we’ll end up fighting.) Instead of taking her out to cheer her up, I hang out with other friends or spend some time alone. It’s been working out well, so far. I don’t get caught up in her moods, and most of all, I’ve learned not to take it personally, that it is a fact of life that one has to deal with. I just have to hang in there, remain seated with my seatbelt fastened until I get past the turbulence.