30 Things Guys Should Know About Girls

[deviant]

30 Things Guys Should Know About Girls
Written by a guy. After years of experience.



1. Whatever you do, don't just show up at their house... they run around in their underwear just like we do.



2. DON'T CHEAT ON THEM. It may seem foolproof, but girls tell each other everything about everything. Trust me, they will find out and you will be mud.



3. Beware of every single male relative and all guy friends. Any of them would kick your butt at the drop of a hat, and a lot of them wouldn't even wait for the hat.



4 NEVER miss an opportunity to tell them they're beautiful.

[don't overdo it]


5. DON'T refuse to kiss in front of your friends. If they laugh at you, it's because they're jealous.



6. If they slap you hard, you DESERVED it.



7. DON'T be afraid to touch them if you want to. If they're going out with you in the first place, it's because they like being in your arms.



8. If you DON'T sleep with them, do not tell your friends that you did.

8.5 If you DO sleep with them, DON'T tell your friends that you did.



9. You CAN be dirty minded in private, really... most of them are not offended by it.



10. Not all of them eat like birds, a lot of them can eat like whales.

fatty nation!


11. Most of them DON'T mind paying half of everything, but they do discuss these things with their friends. Realize that if you make your girlfriend pay half all the time, everyone will know about it and your friends will know you're a prick.

11.5. Do you honestly need all your money that much? Be a man, pay all the time!



12. Every girl should eventually get THREE THINGS from her boyfriend- a stuffed animal, one of his sweatshirts, and a really pretty ring. Even if it's not a serious relationship.
hmmmm how about a necklace? i only have 10 fingers... muahaha



13. Make sure she gets home safely as often as you can. If you're dropping her off, walk her to the door. If you aren't dropping her off, call to be sure she's home safely.



14. If a guy is bothering her, it is your right to kick the crap out of him.



15. If you're talking to a female friend of yours, pull your girlfriend closer.



16. NEVER , ever slap her, even if it's just in a joking way. Even if she swats you first, and says, "Oh, you're so dumb" or something, never make any gestures back.



17. Go to a chick flick once in a while. she DOESN'T care whether you enjoy it or not, it just matters that you went.



18. You're dead meat if you CAN'T get along with their pets, parents and best friends. Be PRINCE CHARMING to their friends, Mr. Polite to their parents, and make sure to be nice to their animals.



19. DON'T flirt with their moms... that's just freaky.



20. DON'T be freaked out by PMS. It's not gross, and it really does make them feel like crap, so be UNDERSTANDING.



21. If you don't like the way they drive, you do it.



22. If you're officially dating, and you're introducing her to your friends, you'd better introduce her as your girlfriend.



23. DON'T stress where you go for every date. They really only want to be with you.



24. If they complain that something hurts, rub it for them without being asked.
ummm i dono.. haha



25. Girls are fragile. Even if you're play fighting/wrestling, be very GENTLE .



26. Memorize their freakin birthdays. You forget her birthday and you're basically screwed for life.



27. DON'T marinade in cologne, but smell good.



28. DON'T give her something stupid for her birthday or Christmas or Valentine's day It doesn't have to be expensive, but it has to be meaningful. Jewelry is always nice.

[aqua teen is never stupid. be creative]


29. If you think the relationship isn't going to last, don't wait to find out. It will only hurt you more if you draw it out.



30. After you've been dating for a while, realize that they really have started to trust you. When you have a girlfriend who truly trusts you, you have a lot more responsibility, privilege and control than you would think. Be careful with it, most guys would kill for that kind of power, and it can be lost in a nanosecond

[Lestat]

1. Whatever you do, don't just show up at their house... they run around in their underwear just like we do.

rightfully deserved to be number one on your list. you just gave the guys a very delightful idea. it would be as effective as saying, "don't peek! i'm naked!" :sarcastic:

2. DON'T CHEAT ON THEM. It may seem foolproof, but girls tell each other everything about everything. Trust me, they will find out and you will be mud.

boy, do i know about this. i'm so befuddled by the range of stuff girls tell other girls about their guys - from the brand of cologne they wear to the flick where you got teary-eyed. i'm actually petrified to know the others in between..

3. Beware of every single male relative and all guy friends. Any of them would kick your butt at the drop of a hat, and a lot of them wouldn't even wait for the (hat.

no question about that. i'll f*cken skin the guy alive who makes my sister cry. nevermind the reason why. you break her heart, you better have a bottle of morphin handy.

4 NEVER miss an opportunity to tell them they're beautiful.

[don't overdo it]

oh, i do. i actually make a conscious effort about it. i picked the idea up from a movie. i forgot which one was it, but the suggestion burned through my mind. is once a day enough? or is it overdoing it?


5. DON'T refuse to kiss in front of your friends. If they laugh at you, it's because they're jealous.

good thing she's uncomfortable with this as i am.

6. If they slap you hard, you DESERVED it.

i've never been slapped. ever. but i do have received a straight right punch to the chest. it's funny how a 4'11 girl can make a 5'10" guy like me double over and see stars for the better part of a minute.


7. DON'T be afraid to touch them if you want to. If they're going out with you in the first place, it's because they like being in your arms.

ha! see number 6. :laugh:

8. If you DON'T sleep with them, do not tell your friends that you did.

8.5 If you DO sleep with them, DON'T tell your friends that you did.

ha again! see number 2. i'm not into kiss and tell. it's not how i was brought up. but if girls could talk to their friends about things like this (yes, you do) why can't we guys? in fact, girls don't keep their naughty confessions exclusively to their gal pals. i actually went pale the first time i heard a friend talk about the stuff he and some guy did. it was so graphic, so detailed, it would put xerex xaviera out of work.

9. You CAN be dirty minded in private, really... most of them are not offended by it.

i know.. dang, i'm really missing that girl right now..

10. Not all of them eat like birds, a lot of them can eat like whales.

fatty nation!

how true is this? :clapping shout: good thing she earns way more than i do and doesn't have qualms of picking up half the tab. even still, it's an unfair ratio. me getting 1/3 of the food and picking up 1/2 of the tab.. :laugh:

11. Most of them DON'T mind paying half of everything, but they do discuss these things with their friends. Realize that if you make your girlfriend pay half all the time, everyone will know about it and your friends will know you're a prick.

oh crap. i spoke to soon. really? oh yeah.. number 2 again. oh crap..

11.5. Do you honestly need all your money that much? Be a man, pay all the time!

honestly? i am needing other people's money as well during bills payment time is what i am.

12. Every girl should eventually get THREE THINGS from her boyfriend- a stuffed animal, one of his sweatshirts, and a really pretty ring. Even if it's not a serious relationship.
hmmmm how about a necklace? i only have 10 fingers... muahaha

then a necklace it is. you only have one neck, muahahah

13. Make sure she gets home safely as often as you can. If you're dropping her off, walk her to the door. If you aren't dropping her off, call to be sure she's home safely.

everytime. one of the things i can actually be proud of.

14. If a guy is bothering her, it is your right to kick the crap out of him.

i don't mind. all is fair in love and war. only until we get married though. you mess with my wife, i'll f*ucken have you eat the skin of the one i flayed that messed with my sister. then i'll skin you too.

15. If you're talking to a female friend of yours, pull your girlfriend closer.

oh definitely. it's some kind of assurance to them. talk about the power of touch. works all the time. if a guy i don't know talks to my girl, i pull her closer.. and place her behind me. it works all the time too. the creep leaves. it's not about jealousy. it's about manners. introduce yourself first to me, moron.

16. NEVER , ever slap her, even if it's just in a joking way. Even if she swats you first, and says, "Oh, you're so dumb" or something, never make any gestures back.

uh-oh. so it's not a game of who slaps harder? oh crap.

17. Go to a chick flick once in a while. she DOESN'T care whether you enjoy it or not, it just matters that you went.

funny..

an ex: you have plans for us yet on saturday?
me : nope. why?
an ex: there's a new fiick that i wanna watch.
me : great! i heard that x-men was the bomb.
an ex: i'm talkin about the piolo and judy ann movie (forgot the title. this was where judy ann was posing to be the mom in exile of piolo's kid daughter)
me : ah.. why not take your ate with you instead?
an ex: baket? kinahihiya mo ba'ng mga type kong movie?? (complete with face flushing)
me : grabe ka naman. of course not. sure, we'll watch that. but we'll watch x-men after ha?

saturday..

an ex : eto money. treat kita. go buy the tickets. i'll stay here.
me : what? why?
an ex : kita mo yun? classmate ko before sa UP. baka makita ako nakapila dyan... nakakahiya. (complete with face flushing)
me : (mumbling incoherently. face flushing)

** eto yung katukayo mo, mrs shimz. :laugh:

18. You're dead meat if you CAN'T get along with their pets, parents and best friends. Be PRINCE CHARMING to their friends, Mr. Polite to their parents, and make sure to be nice to their animals.

one of the reasons why mrs. shimz's katukayo and i split up..

19. DON'T flirt with their moms... that's just freaky.

don't flirt with their moms. period. it's like physics. it's the way things should be.
no need justifying it. ok it's freaky.

20. DON'T be freaked out by PMS. It's not gross, and it really does make them feel like crap, so be UNDERSTANDING.

it doesn't gross me out. it just makes me feel crappy too. it's called empathizing.

21. If you don't like the way they drive, you do it.

i should say this to my girl, not the other way around. and the nerve of it all is she doesn't know how to drive.
:explode:

22. If you're officially dating, and you're introducing her to your friends, you'd better introduce her as your girlfriend.

oh really? you first.

23. DON'T stress where you go for every date. They really only want to be with you.

and it's more exciting that way. you both just go "bahala na", and the next thing you know, you're spending the weekend in nasugbu. sweet.

24. If they complain that something hurts, rub it for them without being asked.
ummm i dono.. haha

i actually agree with this so long as you are in private. ladies?

25. Girls are fragile. Even if you're play fighting/wrestling, be very GENTLE .

how can i not be gentle if i know where it leads to? that all the wrestling and pillow fighting is just a prelude to something more.. physical. :yummy:

26. Memorize their freakin birthdays. You forget her birthday and you're basically screwed for life.

tell me about it. i greeted her advance happy birthday for tomorrow. i was a month and a day off target. i don't know about being screwed for life, but i didn't stop hearing about it for a month. when her birthday came she was like, "binati mo na ako a".

27. DON'T marinade in cologne, but smell good.

one spray on the chest; one spray on the left wrist then rub it against the right. that should do it. ladies?

28. DON'T give her something stupid for her birthday or Christmas or Valentine's day It doesn't have to be expensive, but it has to be meaningful. Jewelry is always nice.

[aqua teen is never stupid. be creative]

what would be stupid?

29. If you think the relationship isn't going to last, don't wait to find out. It will only hurt you more if you draw it out.

that's easy to say. but when you get to actually doing something about it.. hell man, i don't know.. i can't stand the sight of a girl crying.

30. After you've been dating for a while, realize that they really have started to trust you. When you have a girlfriend who truly trusts you, you have a lot more responsibility, privilege and control than you would think. Be careful with it, most guys would kill for that kind of power, and it can be lost in a nanosecond.

AMEN.

great post, mrs. shimz! i enjoyed it immensely (obviously). :laugh:

[deviant]

hilarious--and definitely cute,lash..ahaha..

the moment i read the first line,the thought that came in my mind was the idea that your talking about my katukayo:P with whom you had the best 8 months of your life..ahahaa(lash will surely kick my as*s for saying this..)lol...

thanks for being sooo honest and funny lash..hehe..i enjoyed reading your comments:)

[pambong11]

8. If you DON'T sleep with them, do not tell your friends that you did.

8.5 If you DO sleep with them, DON'T tell your friends that you did.

>
>
>

nicely put mrs shimz!!!

men's balls are stake at here and they

really have none if they resort to such

story-telling-a-lie.

[deviant]

pambong,honestly..we have this attitude na if the guy tell his friends that we slept together..we, girls, joke around our girl friends that that guy has a small peni*s..ahahaha..talk about 'bumabawi':P

its nothing serious naman pero as stated naman,we definitely tell our girlfriends everything..practically,everything..hehehe..kaya sometimes we have this nasty grin on our face:P

[omgwtfpawn]

nice post! ahahha

[rhichard_aguirre]

gahun ba..

[iksgon50]

cool tips...thanx

[Nate115_SCZ]

Thanks Lovely Master Ms Shimz for what you have posted should be a must for every young man before he start dateing women as it will serve them well for the rest of their life and save them from a lot of pain in more ways one can think of

[drei1234]

yeah dami ko nalalaman d2 ahehehe

[thomas187]

nice,.... ;)

[jeffry]

it is good knowledge keep on give ideas

[hmv76]

nice post ... hahaha

[kennyg11225]

this was very helpful

[JonAnonymous]

30 things to know, nice to know.....

[markjerwin]

thnx!! now mei idea na me!!

[xtina03]

cute :D definitely true :))

[marwoto]

wow... some tips i never know before... thx for the tips!

[rsm123]

speaking from experience, ei? :)

[pump_mann]

pucha! bakit ngayun ko lang nabasa to!

[toshiba555]

waa . marami akong natutunan . good good good :}

[kpe123]

dami nga matutunan

[icecoldgulaman]

very useful tips you got here =)

[barucho14]

nice post :laugh::laugh:

[Razor]

thanks for being sooo honest and funny hahaha

[teryus]

opo yes ma'am opo tama po kau

[humihingang_libag]

let me try this with my girl... informative post.. tnx again mam...
what about 30 things girls should know about boys? could it be written by a girl like you mam?

[Swordsong Dreamdancer]

it would be nice if I have Her so I can practice those things on Her. [sighs]

[vouz'e]

may natutunan nanaman ako..... very nice...

[gino_lambating]

i learned something...thanks for posting..

[reijin_11]

aw, nosebleed!!! pero my napickup ako, tapos narealize ko na my mga things pala na included jan na ndi ko nagagwa... bc kasi eh,,,

pero i learned somethings... hahahhaa

[trinolvon]

ahh ganun ba

[Kiln05]

Haha. That made my day.
Thank you for the tips I'll remember them well.

[krazy206]

seen these tips so many times. Doesn't seem to get old

[gelopogi_13]

these are all true. haha..

[redkr]

Lol - great post - made me laugh!

[V@nitY]

So true........

[paglaki]

so thats why it took me almost an hour to be let inside the apartment..

[Mutilation]

nice tips... nkk relate ako

[procorpio]

this one is really nice hehe it's like "the 30 commancments"

hehehe

[angelthesis]

haha! kinda cute! ^_^

[myzteriouz]

14. If a guy is bothering her, it is your right to kick the crap out of him.

I'd say that this one's kinda situational. There's this girl who's being bugged by a colleague and she doesn't mind it that much but the dude deserves to get whacked. You know what I mean?

[diptrix]

nice post,learn a lot for dating....

[utteiy]

next time, i'll do the same.hehehe

[assaxito]

thanks for posting ;)

[theactiveman]

nice!

Great thoughts