Google Spider
02-28-2007, 11:23 PM
A woman walks into a pet store to buy dog food. She gets her dog food, goes to the counter and sees a box on the counter with a sign that reads, "Pussy-eating Frogs, $5". She looks both ways, realizes that no one is watching her and asks the clerk, "Is that for real?" He says, "Yep, and they’re guaranteed." She says, "Ok, box one up for me."
She takes the frog home and can’t wait to try him out. She opens the box and finds a sheet of directions. The directions read, "1) take a shower 2) put on a nice teddy and some perfume 3) get in bed, open your legs and place the frog THERE." So, she follows the directions. She takes a shower, puts on a nice teddy and perfume, goes to the bed, opens her legs and places the frog THERE. Nothing happens. So, she thinks, maybe the frog didn’t like the perfume. She decided to start over; took another shower, put on a teddy, some different perfume, went to the bed, opened the legs, put the frog there, and...nothing. Well, this just won’t do, she thinks.
She goes back to the directions and reads them over again thinking she might have missed something. She notices at the bottom a line in small print that reads, "If you have any problems with the frog, please call your pet store." She calls the pet store and told the man the trouble she was having. He tells her, "I’ll be right over."
The man arrives at the woman’s home and asks her to repeat the process; perhaps he can point out the problem. So, again she showers, puts on a teddy, some perfume and gets in the bed. She opens her legs and puts the frog THERE. Nothing happens. The man says, "I see the problem." He picks up the frog and says to it, "Now, I’m only gonna show you how to do this ONE MORE TIME."
She takes the frog home and can’t wait to try him out. She opens the box and finds a sheet of directions. The directions read, "1) take a shower 2) put on a nice teddy and some perfume 3) get in bed, open your legs and place the frog THERE." So, she follows the directions. She takes a shower, puts on a nice teddy and perfume, goes to the bed, opens her legs and places the frog THERE. Nothing happens. So, she thinks, maybe the frog didn’t like the perfume. She decided to start over; took another shower, put on a teddy, some different perfume, went to the bed, opened the legs, put the frog there, and...nothing. Well, this just won’t do, she thinks.
She goes back to the directions and reads them over again thinking she might have missed something. She notices at the bottom a line in small print that reads, "If you have any problems with the frog, please call your pet store." She calls the pet store and told the man the trouble she was having. He tells her, "I’ll be right over."
The man arrives at the woman’s home and asks her to repeat the process; perhaps he can point out the problem. So, again she showers, puts on a teddy, some perfume and gets in the bed. She opens her legs and puts the frog THERE. Nothing happens. The man says, "I see the problem." He picks up the frog and says to it, "Now, I’m only gonna show you how to do this ONE MORE TIME."